


What You Are

by ikoliholic (makeme)



Category: Thor (Movies), Thor - All Media Types
Genre: Anal Sex, Canon Compliant, Explicit Sexual Content, First Time, Light Angst, Loki Does What He Wants, Loki Has Issues, M/M, Manipulative Loki, Mildly Dubious Consent, Oral Sex, Pre-Canon, Rimming, Some Plot, Talking, Thor Feels, Thor Is Not Stupid, Wordcount: 1.000-5.000, more porn
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-23
Updated: 2015-11-24
Packaged: 2018-05-02 23:11:57
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,374
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5267459
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/makeme/pseuds/ikoliholic
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There have been rumours circulating around Asgard recently that the Second Son of Odin may be of both sexes. Loki wishes to goad Thor into finding out if there is truth in the gossip.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

"I am of age now. Do you not want to find out for yourself?"

Thor's face flushes as red as his ceremonial cape at the whispered suggestion. He wishes he could blame Loki's inappropriate behaviour on mead or wine, but his little brother hasn't touched a drop of it, even though he is now just about old enough.

 _Brother_. Thor flushes again at the very thought.

"Silence, Loki," he whispers harshly. "It matters not to me what you have between your legs. Why would it?" Loki always has a way of getting under his skin, manipulating him with his clever tongue. Thor has made a promise to himself to not allow it anymore. "What worries me is the scheming between your ears."

Loki frowns at the response, cogs turning as he stares at his untouched goblet. He will get what he wants eventually. "Indeed you _should_ be worried. Accusations, gossip and lack of trust have the ability to crush even the most mightiest of families, Thor," he says nonchalantly, looking at his own fingernails. "So hadn't you better know if the tales are tall, or true?"

"Well I _would_ know if you would simply just tell me."

Loki cackles, "Ah, but brother, where would be the fun in that?"

"This is not _fun_ , Loki," Thor shouts, forgetting the intimate nature of the conversation along with the fact that they are sat in the banquet hall amongst many others. "You are always tricking me and I always fall for it!"

Frigga looks at her two sons from across the massive room, Thor's thunderous voice having raised a few eyebrows. "Boys," she calmly says, continuing to pour her wine, "do not misbehave on a day such as today, else your father will have to know about it."

They both huff, respecting their mother enough to not answer her back. The bustle of the golden room continues, albeit a little less loudly. Loki notes that Thor's face is even more sullen and blotchy after Frigga's interjection. "I am _not_ a boy," his older brother bemoans, eventually breaking their silence. "How can I be, when I am so soon to be granted Mjolnir?"

"Well, neither am _I_ now," Loki stammers, haughty. "And-and I'm sure I will get a relic of my own one day soon."

"Ha! You may be allowed mead now, but indeed you  _are_ still naught but a boy," Thor teases, knowing it will upset his little brother.

"I am not!" Loki purses his lips like a petulant child. "Besides, you are only a hundred years my elder. That's nothing."

"A hundred and seven."

"So?"

"So I am a responsible, mature being," Thor exhales proudly, puffing his chest out. "And you are not. You are a little, stupid boy pretending now that he is a man."

"Perhaps." Loki leans in toward his ear. "Or _perhaps_ the malformation gossip is true, and maybe I am a _girl_..." Knowing he's out of sight from prying eyes, and how angry it will make his brother, he pokes his tongue out and licks Thor's ear. The next thing he knows, Thor has thrown him onto the banquet table. Plates and cups and various foods fly into the air and within seconds Odin has them both by the scruff of the neck, one on each hand.

"Cease this embarrassment now!" Anybody who wasn't looking at the debacle certainly is after Odin's voice bellows through the room. "Guards, take them down to the underground chambers to receive punishment."

"Odin-" Frigga interrupts.

"Silence!" he shouts. "They bring shame upon the name Odinson with their lack of wisdom."

"But this is _my_ celebration father, and I have done nothing wrong! It was all him!" Loki pleads. Thor's mouth opens wide in outrage.

"No, it was _him_ , father - he cajoled me-he-he-is not yet a man-"

"You are both not yet men. Not by my eye," Odin growls, "and you must understand such behaviour is an unacceptable way for royalty to act."

As a group of guards pull the two very young, very foolish men away from the festivities and the fracas dies down, Frigga turns to Odin again. "And when will _you_ learn that our boys are still growing up, not yet the kings you wish them to be?"

***

They know the process well enough - it doesn't happen frequently anymore, but it has happened on far more than one occasion prior. They are locked in the hatch -usually together- and are left there until they show an acceptable amount of remorse for their foolish actions. This usually takes a day, but has been known to take up to a week when Thor is feeling particularly stubborn. Once or twice Loki has been thrown in there alone, even though he knew father blamed them both equally, just seeing only fit to punish him.

It wasn't nice to be alone.

This time though, Loki can escape.

"I hope you are satisfied now," Thor says roughly after a lengthy silence, noting how his brother's raven hair is unusually ruffled, though still mostly resting against the nape of his neck. "You are are missing out on your own celebrations."

Fortunately, Loki has simmered down a little; he doesn't take the bait as bitterly as he would have earlier on. "I could easily escape if I wanted to," he says, casually inspecting his own fingernails again. "And at least I can act my age. _A hundred and seven years my elder,_ eh?" he jibes, "You are a positive disgrace to the name Odinson."

Thor snorts, "Pah! You think you are clever with your tricks, but seidr is for women and the weak. You should take your punishment in a manly way, else you will never be as strong as I."

"Very well. We shall sit together in silence."

For all the wisecracks Thor makes about being Loki's superior in age and strength, they both know in reality that it is the truth, and will always be this way. As they sit beside each other in the small stone prison, unable even to stand up in the claustrophobic amount of space available, Loki thinks about how they are the physical opposite of one another. Thor is all golden and regal, with his red cape, fair hair, bronze skin and muscles. Loki knows that one day soon, these muscles will likely treble in size. His brother has not yet reached his physical peak, but even now he is far stronger than Loki himself, who is all willowy and sleek, pale and pasty. Different and strange and strong in ways that are uncommon.

Although in this moment, the moonlight that shines down from a crack in the stone above cascades a silvery light onto Thor's face and neck that Loki finds enjoyable. Like he _isn't_ quite so chiseled from bronze, glazed in gold. Perhaps he _is_ stony and pale and interesting, not quite the flawless Aesir that Odin along with the rest of Asgard wills him to be.

"Why do you look at me so?" Thor gruffs after a while. "You embarrass me, brother."

Loki blinks. Can he help it if he's as awestruck as the rest of this realm at his brother's magnificence? In the silence, Thor simply meets his brother's stare with equal force. Loki finally speaks, low and unusually soft. "The moonlight makes you look something other than what you are, brother."

"What do you mean, riddlesmith?" Thor asks, equally as low.

"I mean what I say." He splutters his words out like an annoyed child now, "It makes you look... pale. Almost imperfect."

Thor thinks before he speaks. "Perhaps I am imperfect."

Loki laughs, "Brother, I _know_ what you are."

"And do I know what you are, Loki?"

Loki stops his sardonic behaviour and seizes the opportunity with a coy grin. "You can find out, if you want to."

Thor thinks back to a few hours ago, and the implied meaning. He knows that Loki is becoming increasingly dangerous with his mischief and tricks. He thinks he still knows his brother better than anyone, but then there are times when he isn't so sure. Either way, he'd be lying if he didn't admit he was curious.

He's getting better at lies.

They both are.

"You forget," he responds, nonchalant. "I have seen you naked plenty of times. When we were boys."

"I thought I still _was_ a boy?"

"Shut up."

"Perhaps I'm not a boy..."

" _Loki,_ " Thor simmers, "stop it."

But Loki does not stop. "Come on, it is just me and you here." He smiles, sardonic and sweet. "Nobody will know. It will take but a minute for you to check, then you can be sure."

"I have told you, it matters not," Thor warns, increasingly flushed.  _Again_. Such matters should not make him feel so heated. "Whether you are male or female, both or neither, you are still my brother."

"Well, it matters to _me,_ " Loki counters, voice rich with genuine emotion as he continues with his blackmail. "And if you loved me, you would find out what I am with your own eyes."

Something in his brother's words makes Thor's resolve snap - he tells himself it is not desire, it is not not not desire. He continues to tell himself this as he slowly pushes Loki's slender body flat to the ground and begins to undo the buckles and buttons on his freshly-presented ceremonial dress -dark green and grey fabric ribboning to the cold, hard stone beneath them- exposing naked, pale torso to slices of moonlight from up above. He watches as Loki's chest rises and falls in a stuttered, panicked manner, betraying his lack of words as a cool reaction to being undressed by his own brother. It is then that Thor realises he himself is also struggling to breathe evenly.

He reaches out and places one hand delicately on Loki's torso, feeling an icy burn surge through his fingers. Loki looks so young, so incredibly young and naive and _beautiful_ , bewilderment etched into his face as Thor hesitates to continue. "You have not been touched by another, have you?"

"Suh-so?" Loki manages, voice wavering as Thor traces smooth skin with fingertips. "Wuh-what does that matter?"

Thor presses his lips to Loki's forehead, hearing breath hitch beneath him as he does so. Then, he continues to undress Loki with trembling hands, pulling the clothing down past his hips and legs, exposing his cock. It's erect, leaking against his abdomen, Thor notes; and once again from seeing Loki's body react, he realises that he himself is painfully hard against the confines of his ceremonial wear. He pushes the feeling of vile sin down from his throat and continues further, peeling the material from his brother's legs and removing his boots too, until Loki is finally, fully naked.

The body beneath him is smooth and mostly hairless, save for a neat tuft of curls around his pelvic area along with some wiry stray poking through from his underarms, and the sparse, almost golden hairs all over his legs. His skin is a luminescent shade of ivory that borders between sanguine and pallid, like it can't quite decide which to be, tautly encasing lithe muscle and bone, quivering with both fear and anticipation.

His expression is unreadable to most, but Thor knows him better than anybody. He is truly afraid of what he has started, trying defiantly to hide it. Thor quite agrees too. He _should_ be afraid.

They both should.

Loki's eyes are blue-green, like a rarer kind of emerald, and wide in his face as Thor drags large hands down his slim torso, past jutting hips and skims across his legs, not once breaking eye-contact, as if his hands already know exactly where they are supposed to go. They coil around Loki's ankles like a serpent would, pushing forward to bend knees toward chest, exposing the part of Loki's anatomy in question.

"So," Thor says, voice devoid of anything, but his breath rattles. "Would you still have me find out for myself, brother? This is your final opportunity to back down." He keeps staring at Loki's stubborn, frightened face, watches as his eyebrows knot into a frown; then finds himself pulled down closer, breath hot and ticklish in his ear.

"This is _your_ final opportunity," Loki bites. "Do it."

So he does.

He keeps Loki's ankles in place, knees flush with his chest, and looks for a brief second. The sight of his brother under him seers, and he averts his gaze by closing his eyes, resting his forehead on top of Loki's as he tries to remove the image from his mind.

He cannot.

Deciding that it will be impossible to tell, because Loki's testicles hang tightly where it could be, and he cannot _look_ again for fear of blinding himself, he knows by some twisted state of logic that instead he must _touch_. As he trails one of his hands down, gripping two ankles with the other hand, he observes how silky smooth Loki's skin is - how he could very easily be a woman with such softness. The thought arousing him even more, he thwarts it from his mind as he reaches his target. The skin between Loki's legs is somehow even smoother, and as he drags a finger across the crease of his arse and upwards, fondling the sensitive skin beneath Loki's testicles, he finds nothing.

He has been tricked.

It is hard to show much anger, however, because as his fingers continue to knead in search for proof of Loki's sex, Loki's mouth can hold in no more, moaning and whining with raw pleasure - so loud it echoes even in the tiny chamber they're locked in. The sounds are so crude, so uninhibited that they send jolts through Thor's blood, straight to his erection. Panicking, Thor releases Loki's wriggling legs from his grip and covers Loki's mouth with his hand, shoving fingers in when that doesn't work. Loki bites down, sucks at them. A hot wet tongue at his fingertips, a willing, forbidden mouth beneath him and suddenly he wants to taste it, he realises it _is_ desire...

And never one to be deprived of any such urge, Thor abides himself.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a quick note: I got a comment on Chapter One asking what Thor and Loki's actual age is in this work... I'd left it deliberately vague to leave it to the reader's imagination, however I intended them both to be the Asgardian equivalent to 18 years old, with Loki looking slightly younger and Thor slightly older.

At first, Thor kisses his brother as he has kissed many a willing maiden, but this soon becomes different. Loki isn't all sensuous motion and modest chastity, no. He is messy and greedy, mouth all teeth and tongue as little whimpers rise up from his throat when Thor's mouth is particularly savage against his own; he can give as good as he gets. Clawing at Thor's blonde hair with shaky fingers, Loki urges him on, though he doesn't need much encouragement; he tongues his way down Loki's smooth jawline, down his neck where the flesh appears to be particularly sensitive - judging by the moans of pleasure heard as his sucks skin between his teeth. As he continues to taste, Thor inhales deeply, smelling delicately sweet jasmine and bergamot, and when he feels that Loki cannot take any further torture, he stops and gazes at green eyes.

Clearly, they _do_ want more torture, but Thor wants to examine something else. He shuffles down Loki's body and bends his legs back again, this time by splaying wide hands at the back of slim thighs.

"What are you-"

" _Finding out with my own eyes_."

And it is a sight indeed. Perfectly smooth like finest marble, pale and cool to the touch. He wants to taste this too, so he ventures his head closer for a more thorough inspection, conscious of Loki's heavy, stuttered breathing as he does so. Observing Loki's sac coiling in anticipation, he starts there - gently brushing his tongue against the delicate skin, dragging his tongue downwards until he reaches the puckered entrance he has longed to devour he laid eyes on it just moments before.

Loki whines as Thor laps at the hole, forcing the tight skin open with his probing tongue. It tastes sinful.

"Do you wish you were of both sexes?" Thor demands, the question burning in his mind, breath tickling the trail of saliva he has left all over Loki's rear.

"S-sometimes. I like the rumours," Loki stammers, honest for once. Now that they have stopped, Thor knows this cannot and should not continue further, but Loki is one step ahead of him as always. "I want this, Thor. We are both of age. You know that nobody else can take me thus," he pants, convincingly, "I couldn't trust them to be discreet."

"Loki..."

"It will be purely an act, no emotion." Loki's words soothe, but Thor knows that Loki will take advantage of his kindness, manipulate his trust - he knows this more than anything now. It is the way it is, and he worries that it will always be. They are young still. "Do not make me beg, Thor."

"No."

"Please..."

" _No_ ," he scuttles away. "This trick has gone too far already, brother."

Loki sits up and gestures to his own naked body - painfully hard erection pressed against his belly. "D'you think?"

"You lied to me," Thor cannot hide the hurt in his voice now.

"No I didn't," Loki offers, "I simply offered you an impulse on which to act. And you kissed me. Used your tongue. Intimately."

Thor's face etches with embarrassment. "You did not want me to?"

" _Of course I did,_ " Loki strops, "so why you have stopped?"

"Because it is wrong, and you know it."

"'Tis not wrong when it feels so pleasurable, brother," Loki wagers, leaning in closer to Thor, voice becoming a whisper. "And you should not feel any guilt for a mere sexual act; we are not maudlin Midgardians, y'know. Come here, I will show you what I desire." He grabs Thor's fingers, coating them with his own saliva, guides them to his entrance. He pauses for a minute, eyes green and fierce, then pushes one of them in, letting Thor do the rest of the work.

"Mmm yes, just like that," he bobs his head back as Thor grips his shoulder tight. "More spit. Mmm, good. That's it." The reassurances are welcomed by Thor-- he is inexperienced, as well as in a numbed state of shock at the forwardness Loki is displaying. It's most unnerving, so vicarious having his brother be the picture of debauchery in his lap. Never even in Thor's darkest imaginings had he conjured up a depiction so morally wicked...

He wonders then, if Loki has.

Thor is stolen from such thoughts, however, as Loki claws at his garments, fingers delicate but purposeful. They succeed in undressing Thor's top half with ease, and Thor removes the clothing constraining his bottom half - wishing them both to be fully naked with one another.

Upon seeing it, Loki quietly gasps at the size of Thor's cock. Before either can process anything further, he bobs his head down and swallows thickly. Thor's mind turns to pieces at the degradation, the unspoken act that is seldom accepted as decent in their society.

"You are not the only one who wishes to taste." Loki says with wicked, earnest malice, in-between lapping and spitting and sucking, eyes watering as he gags himself with it. "And judging by the size, I think I will be in dire need of the lubrication."

Thor pulls him upward, burning at the image the words foretell and willing his brother's wicked tongue to cease. He does not want to be so base - not yet - so instead he kisses Loki again. Tasting himself on his brother's lips, the burning shame intensifies, along with his desire to desecrate.

"I cannot decide which tastes better," Loki's voice delicately reverberates in his ear, the uncharacteristic act of freely complimenting Thor surprising them both. "Truly exquisite you are, _brother_. Practiced too, I imagine... if the women of Asgard are anything to go by."

Thor understands what Loki wants to know. "I am virginial as you are," he says, while Loki quirks his eyebrow in disbelief.

"Lying suits you ill, golden brother mine," Loki jibes as he leans in to lick at Thor's throat.

"I swear it true. I've never gone beyond the innocence of a kiss," Thor admits, groaning as Loki starts to suck. "You of all people should know that gossip does not always carry truth."

"Ah," Loki bites viciously at Thor's throat, eliciting a startled moan. "How disappointing," he continues, but he smiles into Thor's neck nonetheless. "They speak too of your warrior prowess, _ferocious_ for one so young."

"I was waiting for an honourable enough maiden."

"Have you found what you seek?" Loki laughs now, wild and vicious as he thrusts Thor's fingers back into the tight space that they are craving, where they roughly scrape and cause him to groan through the cachinnation. "Sentimental fool."

So _tight_. Thor knots his free hand into Loki's hair and builds a slow, deliberate rhythm, watching his brother's laughter turn to ragged pleasure as he falls apart in his lap, every movement making them both crave the inevitable. "Brother," he murmurs finally against Loki's throat, utterly lost. "I want it too."

Without hesitation, care or decency, Loki spears himself on Thor's cock, crying out in pleasure-pain and digging fingers into broad shoulders. Thor holds Loki gently, feeling with reverence the smooth nape of pale neck where damp black curls twist with sweat, gliding his fingers down to the protruding spine and the alluring curve of buttocks as Loki grinds and writhes, legs tightening around the small of Thor's back. He remains powerless, leaned against the cold stone of the wall and floor as Loki continues his slow,  tortuous rhythm, relishing every tiny movement.

Thor's face is etched with unnerved pleasure - Loki carefully studies it like he would a precious scroll - tracing pale fingers along a tensed jawline before closing their distance with a slow and deliberate kiss, breathtaking in its patience and intimacy.

Thor can take no more after that - it is too exquisite, so much more than an act of carnal desire that it is almost laughable to suggest otherwise. He pushes Loki onto his back and becomes maddened with lust, heedless of strength as he dominates and thrusts, hands pulling and clawing at Loki's hair, throat and wrists as Loki struggles to do much else except attempt to breathe. When he _can_ eventually breathe without too much pause, he vocalises clever, disjointed curses aloud, interjected with cries of pleasure as Thor pounds into him; curses so outrageous in content that when he can comprehend them, even during an act so feral, Thor feels ashamed.

"Mmm, rassragr you -ah!- make of me, golden and comely brother…my blood, my-e-enemy, my only f-friend...and _now_ ," he chokes on every syllable as Thor drinks it all up. "My fuh-my first--"

In the end, Thor has to cover the immoral silvertongue with firm hands, and then opts for quietening with his mouth instead. He keeps the maddening pace but manages to be slightly more controlled, feels bold enough to grab Loki's leaking cock into his palm, building a patterned rhythm that gives no respite to either. Loki howls at the sensation and digs his fingernails into Thor's arse, deliberately seizing the opportunity to drag a finger between the two cheeks to stimulate more sensitive flesh.

"I am learning how to change form, brother," Loki shakily says while Thor bites and moans into his neck, unable to resist it. “Per-haps, perhaps one day I will shapeshift into a buxom woman, and you would have me with my legs spread wider still."

Thor groans at indecency of the idea, but wonders if anything could feel as sordidly good as the rough, tight heat presently consuming him. He doubts it. "Be _quiet,_ " he murmurs, worrying if there are guards listening. "Lest you would have me gag you with my fingers again. There may be--"

"And let them hear!" Loki shouts, knowing already that he has cast a glamour around their temporary prison. His goading rewards him with a strike across the face, to which he laughs, until laughs become painful ecstasy once more as fingers are thrust into his mouth with no regard. "Thor," he gargles around them, spoken like an oath. He repeats the word, over and over, moaning and humming in appreciation too.

It is at his name that Thor feels the tip of his orgasm cresting. He replaces his rough hand with the spit-slicked one around Loki's cock and watches in exhilaration as his brother comes undone beneath him - the process so intense that he himself stutters and spends, fit to burst into a million shards alongside Loki, the journey into carnality now complete.

Afterwards, they share a satisfied kiss entwined around each other, before denial and shame begin swiftly to take over.

Loki breaks the silence as they scramble to put their garments back on. "Now you know what I truly am, brother." His voice tries to be clinical and cool, but Thor knows him better. "Tell me, _chastity-taker_ , can you handle the truth of it?"

Thor prickles with denial and shame and worst of all - sentiment. "We will never speak of this again, Loki."

"I know. That is the way it must be." Loki pretends to look unaffected as his eyes betray him, "But know this," he wraps his green cape around Thor's shoulders and pulls him closer, speaking lowly, "I know now what _you_ are too, imperfect brother mine. You have darkness to your light."

"Loki, I-"

"And I love you."

Thor does not need to say he loves him too. Instead, he curls his hand around Loki's neck and kisses him for what he knows will be the last time. They are men now. They are _gods_. More importantly, they have no idea of what lies ahead - how they will come to define and defy one another in ways unimaginable, unforgivable - and they are young enough to remain foolish and oblivious for a while yet.

Thor smiles in the gentle, forgiving silence, remembering something Loki slipped up with during their coupling. "Can you really get us out of here?" he asks excitedly, knowing the trouble and possible implications.

"Brother," Loki smirks as the glow of subtle, dangerous magic swirls golden around his fingers, eyes bright and green. "Would I lie to you?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, I hope you enjoyed! Any comments/concrit very welcome, and as usual I will see you all in Hel...


End file.
